Monday Puns

Mondays don’t have to be a totally weak start, let’s turn them into a laugh-fest! When you’re sipping your coffee or dodging that dreaded Monday morning meeting, these hilarious Monday puns and jokes are here to give your week a pun-direful boost.

Why did Monday apply for a job? Because it wanted to work its weak magic! And why don’t we ever trust Mondays? Because they’re always up to something on weekdays.

From funny one-liners to family-friendly jokes perfect for the office or classroom, we’ve got your cure for the Monday blues right here.

👉 Ready to laugh your way into the week? Scroll down for the best Monday humor that’ll have you saying, Monday? More like Funday!

Monday Morning Dad Jokes

Monday Morning Dad Jokes
  • Why don’t dads fight Mondays? Because their coffee’s stronger than any alarm clock!
  • What’s Dad’s morning motto? Conquer the day after conquering the coffee pot.
  • Why did Dad bring glue to work? To stick to his Monday goals!
  • What’s a dad’s idea of multitasking? Yawning and making breakfast at the same time.
  • Why do dads love Mondays? It’s another chance to make weekend plans!
  • Why did Dad talk to his shoes? He needed help stepping into the workweek.
  • How do dads measure Monday success? One clean shirt, two strong coffees, zero meetings.
  • Why do dads love office chairs? Perfect for spinning away from Monday emails.
  • Why did Dad wink at the calendar? He saw Friday in the distance.
  • Why are dad jokes stronger on Mondays? They need to carry the whole team meeting.
  • What’s Dad’s Monday superpower? Making a full lunch with one hand and zero motivation.
  • Why did Dad whistle at 9 a.m.? He survived the first hour of the Monday hustle.

Happy Monday Jokes One Liners

  • Why don’t Mondays wear shoes? They always start off on the wrong foot.
  • Why did the calendar blush? Because Monday saw it without a weekend.
  • What’s Monday’s favorite snack? A leftover slice of humble pie.
  • Why did Monday join the gym? To strengthen its weak reputation.
  • What’s Monday’s favorite color? Anything but blue.
  • Why don’t Mondays ever win? They’re always starting from zero.
  • Why did Monday cross the road? To get to Friday faster.
  • Why is Monday always tiring? It partied too hard with Sunday night stress.
  • What’s Monday’s favorite drink? Cold-brewed survival.
  • Why does Monday carry a backpack? It brings all the baggage from the weekend.
  • Why did Monday cry in the mirror? It realized it wasn’t Saturday.
  • What do you call a happy Monday? A rare sighting.

Funny Jokes For Monday Morning

  • Why did the toaster refuse to work? It couldn’t face another Monday.
  • Why did the coffee file a complaint? I’m tired of doing all the Monday lifting.
  • What’s the slowest thing on Mondays? The Wi-Fi and your soul.
  • Why did the cereal jump out of the bowl? It wanted to escape the morning chaos.
  • What does a sleepy keyboard say? “Ctrl + Alt + Nap.”
  • Why don’t alarms like Monday? It’s their busiest day of the week.
  • Why did the eggs roll off the counter? Even breakfast wanted out.
  • What’s Monday’s hero? A sloth on snooze.
  • Why don’t Mondays make good friends? They never bring donuts.
  • What’s the weather forecast for Mondays? 100% chance of meh.
  • Why did the mug hide? It knew it was a Monday morning.
  • Why do socks disappear on Mondays? They’re starting a rebellion.

Monday Jokes For The Office

Monday Jokes For The Office
  • Why did the stapler quit? Too many paper jams on Mondays.
  • Why does the printer groan? It dreads the Monday report rush.
  • Why did the chair roll away? It knew it was a meeting day.
  • What’s the office’s least favorite word? Monday.
  • Why was the watercooler full? No one had energy for chit-chat.
  • Why don’t office plants grow on Monday? They sense the negativity.
  • Why do monitors flicker on Monday? Even the screen’s exhausted.
  • Why does Monday feel like forever? Because it’s one long spreadsheet.
  • Why did the desk drawer lock itself? It refused to face emails.
  • Why did the copy machine scream? Monday morning overload.
  • Why did Monday bring coffee for everyone? So it wouldn’t be unfriendly.
  • Why did the office fan slow down? Monday melted its motivation.

Related Post: August Puns That Make That Month Extra Funny

Monday Jokes For Work

  • Why was the boss late? Even their calendar hit snooze.
  • Why do ties fear Mondays? They’re always part of the drama.
  • Why did the file run away? It couldn’t handle Monday pressure.
  • Why do pens stop working on Monday? They just can’t deal.
  • Why is Monday the worst coworker? Always brings a pile of tasks.
  • What’s Monday’s idea of fun? A meeting with no snacks.
  • Why did the mouse take a sick day? It’s allergic to clicks.
  • Why don’t meetings work on Monday? Everyone’s still on weekend mode.
  • Why did the whiteboard cry? Too many deadlines.
  • Why do calendars avoid eye contact? Monday’s a troublemaker.
  • Why is Monday so cold? Because it left all its warmth on Sunday.
  • Why do keyboards complain? Too much typing stress on Mondays.

Funny Things To Say About Monday

  • Why does Monday act like royalty? Because it always demands attention.
  • Why is Monday like a speed bump? It slows down all your weekend energy.
  • What did Monday say to Friday? “I’ll never be you.”
  • Why does Monday need therapy? It has major trust issues with alarm clocks.
  • Why is Monday like laundry? You keep putting it off, but it keeps coming back.
  • Why don’t jokes land on Mondays? No one’s had enough coffee.
  • What’s Monday’s favorite food? Instant regret-oatmeal.
  • Why does Monday hate mirrors? It can’t face the truth.
  • Why does Monday feel so long? It’s made of extra hours.
  • Why did Monday get a warning? Too many emotional damage reports.
  • Why is Monday banned from brunch? It ruins the whole vibe.
  • Why did the brain freeze on Monday? Too much thinking before 9 a.m.

Monday Joke Of The Day For Kids

Monday Joke Of The Day For Kids
  • Why did the pencil cry on Monday? It missed the weekend’s coloring time.
  • Why did Monday skip recess? It got too many frowns.
  • What did the backpack say on Monday? “Not you again!”
  • Why don’t kids like Monday? No cartoons, just classroom chairs.
  • Why did the crayon go on strike? It didn’t want to color math homework.
  • Why did Monday hide behind the chalkboard? It knew it wasn’t welcome.
  • Why was the ruler mad? It had to measure long Mondays.
  • Why did the eraser cheer up? Because Friday’s only four days away!
  • Why do kids call Monday a mystery? No one knows where the fun went.
  • What did the book say on Monday? “Open me… gently.”
  • Why did Monday trip over its own feet? It forgot its routine.
  • Why did the scissors yawn? Monday’s cutting into its nap time.

Enjoy a Smile with Monday Puns and Jokes!

  • Why is Monday always grumpy? It wakes up too early like the rest of us.
  • Why don’t Mondays tell jokes? They’re the punchline.
  • Why did the calendar take a nap? It had a rough startMonday.
  • Why did the sandwich sigh? It knew Monday meant another lunchbox day.
  • Why does Monday wear sunglasses? To hide its tired eyes.
  • Why was the laptop lagging? It’s running on Monday mode.
  • Why did the donut roll away? It couldn’t face Monday morning.
  • Why was the fan spinning slowly? Monday drained its motivation.
  • Why do clouds cry on Monday? Even the weather feels it.
  • Why did the smoothie stop blending? Mondays mess up everything.
  • What’s Monday’s favorite word? “Again?”
  • Why is Monday so clingy? It never lets the weekend go.

Short Monday Jokes for Adults

  • Why did the adult bring two mugs? One for coffee, one for emotions.
  • Why did Monday get blocked? Too many spam vibes.
  • Why do grown-ups dread Monday? It feels like an emotional tax season.
  • Why did the spreadsheet sigh? Monday’s back with more data.
  • Why don’t alarms apologize? Because Monday pain is intentional.
  • Why is Monday like socks? Always mismatched with your mood.
  • Why did the adult yell at the mirror? It reflected Monday’s truth.
  • Why is coffee the MVP? Only it survives Monday mornings.
  • Why did the adult carry a blanket to work? Emotional support.
  • What’s Monday’s nickname? Captain Chores.
  • Why do adults check the clock every 2 minutes? Hoping it’s Friday.
  • Why is Monday allergic to joy? It’s never been to brunch.

Monday Jokes Quotes

Monday Jokes Quotes
  • Why did Monday quote itself? It said, “Here we go again.”
  • What’s Monday’s favorite quote? “I survived the weekend barely.”
  • Why don’t quotes help on Monday? Words can’t fix a tired soul.
  • What did Monday write on the whiteboard? “Coffee first. Regret later.”
  • Why is Monday like a fortune cookie? Always vague but never hopeful.
  • What’s the most honest quote on Monday? “I’d rather be sleeping.”
  • Why did Monday frame its quote? So people would take it seriously.
  • Why don’t people share Monday quotes? Too relatable, too painful.
  • What’s the only quote you need on Monday? “One hour at a time.”
  • Why does Monday speak in bold? To look more motivated than it feels.
  • What’s a good Monday motto? “If I’m moving, I’m winning.”
  • What quote sums up Monday? “Coffee. Chaos. Carry on.”

Monday Jokes for Students

  • Why did the student wear pajamas to school? It’s a Monday mood.
  • Why was the backpack grumpy? I missed the weekend break.
  • Why did the pencil sigh? It’s spelling tests all over again.
  • Why do lockers hate Mondays? Too many slammed doors.
  • Why don’t students like Monday? It smells like homework.
  • What did the notebook say on Monday? “Please write gently, I’m not awake.”
  • Why was the ruler confused? Monday threw off its schedule.
  • Why did the lunchbox complain? Back to boring sandwiches.
  • Why does the school bell drag on Monday? It’s stuck in slow motion.
  • Why was the math book nervous? Monday means extra problems.
  • Why did the student whisper? Monday’s too early for volume.
  • Why did the eraser take the day off? Tired of Monday mistakes.

Funny Vibes: Jokes for Kids That Spark Big Giggles Daily

Foolish Monday Jokes

  • Why did Monday try to swim? It thought it was deep.
  • Why did the stapler join a band? To escape the office on Monday.
  • Why did Monday wear flip-flops? It forgot how weeks work.
  • Why did the alarm bark? Monday trained it wrong.
  • Why did the donut apply for CEO? It had a whole lotta confidence.
  • Why did Monday bring a map? It got lost in the week again.
  • Why did the fork skip breakfast? I was tired of spooning on Monday.
  • Why did the couch walk away? It refused to face responsibilities.
  • Why did Monday stare at a banana? Waiting for a sign of progress.
  • Why did the keyboard dance? It hit “Ctrl-Alt-Delight.”
  • Why did Monday write poetry? It needed validation.
  • Why did the remote hide? Even it couldn’t change.

Positive Monday Jokes

Positive Monday Jokes
  • Why did Monday smile? Someone brought donuts.
  • Why is Monday great for goals? Because it’s the start of something new.
  • Why did the planner love Monday? It finally felt useful again.
  • Why is Monday like a blank page? You get to rewrite your week.
  • What’s Monday’s secret? It’s full of potential (and caffeine).
  • Why did Monday shine? The sun showed up, and so did you.
  • Why did the coffee cheer? Monday gave it purpose.
  • What did the mirror say on Monday? “You got this.”
  • Why did the notebook high-five Monday? For giving it a fresh start.
  • Why do plants love Monday? New light, new growth.
  • Why did the shoes dance? Monday gave them a reason to move.
  • Why is Monday a clean slate? Because last week is history.

Monday Knock Knock Jokes One Liners

  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Moan. Moan who?
    Moan-day. And I brought emails.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Coffee. Coffee who?
    Coffee you make on Friday?
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Alarm. Alarm who?
    Alarm sorry you had to wake up.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Desk. Desk who?
    Desk me laterI’m busy surviving Monday.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Shoes. Shoes who?
    Shoes the fool who planned a meeting today?
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Done. Done who?
    Done with Monday and it’s only 9 a.m.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Laptop. Laptop who?
    Laptop your expectationsit’s Monday!
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Not. Not who?
    Not ready. Definitely not ready.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Break. Break who?
    Break time already? Asking for a friend.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Week. Week who?
    The week just started. Buckle up!
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Plan. Plan who?
    Plan to nap through this.
  • Knock knock. Who’s there?
    Chore. Chore who?
    Chore kidding me it’s Monday?

Best Laughs of the Week

  • Why did Friday hug Monday? It missed annoying its coworkers.
  • Why is Wednesday jealous? Monday gets all the attention.
  • Why did Sunday sneak away? So Monday wouldn’t follow.
  • Why did Tuesday roll its eyes? Monday gets blamed for everything.
  • Why did Thursday dress up? It’s one step closer to Friday fun.
  • Why is Friday everyone’s favorite? It fires Monday with style.
  • Why did Saturday snore? It outran Monday’s drama.
  • Why do people love the weekend? No Monday in sight!
  • Why does the week feel like a movie? Monday’s the villain.
  • Why did the calendar blush? It couldn’t handle Monday’s memes.
  • Why does Monday never RSVP? It just shows up.
  • Why did the week end with a giggle? Because Monday jokes are the best!

Conclusion

And there you have it, a bundle of Monday puns and jokes to turn even the grumpiest morning into a giggle-fest! When you’re sipping coffee, stuck in traffic, or cheering up at the office, a little humor goes a long way to chase away those weekday blues. Mondays may never be anyone’s favorite, but with a few clever one-liners and funny quips, they can at least bring a smile.

What’s your favorite Monday joke? Drop it in the comments and share these laughs with your friends. They deserve a brighter start too. After all, every laugh shared is one step closer to turning Monday into Funday!

By Eirla Vennox

Hi, I’m Eirla Vennox, the Admin of bigsmiler.com. I manage everything behind the scenes to keep your experience smooth, stylish, and full of good vibes.

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